ha ha, just kidding! but i wish. because, really, what one needs when one’s tonsils feel like they’ve been dragged across the sidewalk with a blowtorch and one’s body feels like it’s been replaced with that of a wooden marionette about as graceful as the puppetmaster dance from yo gabba gabba and one just cannot seem to breathe air through one’s nose is a “juicy” (see what i did there?) mcitaly with artichoke spread.
no, wait, kidding, really.
i’ll just have some campbell’s chicken and stars – despite the company’s decree that women shall only eat 80 calories for lunch (don’t get me started, please). i’ll also follow up with my dessert of choice, the ever-classy little debbie swiss cake roll. in your face, campbell’s.